Two Young Sisters Walk In Memory Of Their Baby Brother


Support Meetings Are Open To The General Public. Please Feel Free To Come And Share or Sit And Listen if You Have Lost A Child.



GRIEF / LOSS SUPPORT - Wednesday, July 14th at 7pm in the Community Room at the Whiting Library in Chester, Vermont.

Facilitator: Cara Tyrrell - Email Me 117 Main St ~ Chester, VT 05143


PALS (Pregnancy or Parenting After Loss) : To make these meetings more accessible please contact Gretchen if you have a PALS related issue and she will organize a meeting in your area.

Facilitator: Gretchen Lunderville - Email Her


The Board of Directors next meeting is set for Wednesday, July 7th. If you have an agenda item please email cara.

Friday, January 16, 2009

Show and Tell - Beliefs and Realities

SSV's site is a Show & Tell virgin, but it's time has come! With our first meeting under our belt and a HOST of ideas and planning happening - it is time to SHARE with you.

First, let me tell you a few things about my belief system. I believe it is important to:

1. Always be 5 minutes early.
2. Always be well prepared, obsessevily prepared is better.

3. Always bring chocolate when you bring tissues.

4. Always admit your mistakes

5. And - (most importantly) - ALWAYS be able to laugh at yourself

With that said, it's storytime.

"Oh God, please let some people show up. Just a few. A good beginning, core group." I said to myself as I drove to meet the one other bereaved mother I knew was coming. The box shifted in the backseat. It held everything I thought I needed, and more, to run an effective first meeting.

It held the buntings, a small lending library, my binder, Emma's scrapbook, the first memory box, pens, napkins, tissues, parent packets and CHOCOLATE!

We arrived at the gorgeous building that had been erected only two years ago. Wow - we really are so lucky that a meeting room was available. I thought as we walked in the front door at 6:30pm. (meeting started at seven)

"Hi, Can I help you?" the lady at the very formal sliding window asked with a skeptical glance.

"Oh, no thank you" I said "We are with Share - pregnancy and infant loss support. Scott will be meeting us in just a few minutes to show us to our room." He had told me so when I confirmed on Monday.

"Um, Scott?" she said, clearly confused. "We don't have any Scott on staff and I know nothing about your group." Still, and speaks to the work I have done this year, I wasn't panicked - or worried in the least. That is, until she said, "And I do all the room bookings for the whole building."

Are you laughing yet? I did. What else was there left to do?

I micro-managed. I folded brochures. I stuffed parent packets. I created an agenda. I called to confirm. Ah yes - that call.

This is HCRS - The Health Care Rehabilitation Services Center (a state run office)

Nice, huh? Well - it is NOT the building I had been calling.

This is the Health And Rehabilitation Center.

It is GREAT! It is perfect for us! It is where Scott had been waiting in the lobby for 20 minutes.

We rushed over as my prayers did a 180. "Please God, DON'T let anyone else come. Please! Please!" I mean, what could be worse than finding the courage to attend your first support meeting only to arrive at the wrong building and be re-directed across town?

And so, my prayers were answered! My meeting partner and I were the only two. It was a perfect first meeting. We got a great deal done. We began planning our Mother's Day memory walk. We drafted our brochure and cover letter for doctor's offices. And, the best part, we got to know each other even better, sharing more of our loss stories.

And within 48 hours... The flyers were done.
The business cards were done.

And we have begun distrubuting to local offices.

So - let's review:

1. Always be 5 minutes early. (just barely)
2. Always be well prepared, obsessevily prepared is better. (check)
3. Always bring chocolate when you bring tissues. (what do you think was in the plastic bag?)
4. Always admit your mistakes (I just did!)
5. And - (most importantly) - ALWAYS be able to laugh at yourself (I still am, are you?)

I leave you with this:

If you are from the blogosphere - thanks for reading and laughing with me.

If you live locally and plan on attending the group someday - know that I will never have expectations of you. Clearly - I have no right - as I can't even call the right number! I WILL, however, always be early, set up and ready with tissues and chocolate.

But, please, come to the Springfield HEATH AND REHABILITATION CENTER at 105 Chester Rd. for I WILL NOT be at the HCRS building - again- looking sheepishly at a phone book where a four letter word, or lack there of, sent me uptown when I should have been down.


  1. Obviously the town planners are out having coffee on the days when name approval comes in. That has to happen frequently, and I'm wondering why she didn't know who Steve is. Glad your inaugural meeting went well, though.

  2. Wow...for a slightly rocky start, y'all got a lot done. Congrats.

    BTW, I love that you can laugh at yourself.

  3. ha ha - it gets confusing doesn't it when places have similar names or stuff like that!

  4. I'm glad it all worked out, and I am relieved, now I can laugh. You sure did get alot done, that's great.

  5. I'm so impressed with your courage to get this up and running. What a wonderful outreach you're providing! I've been thinking about asking my church about me starting an infertility support group, and it's really great to hear about other people who are starting things too.

  6. Mmmmm chocolate. Looks like you were well prepared! Thanks for sharing.

  7. Good for you for both doing ALL the work AND laughing at yourself! I think it's a wonderful thing.
    Enjoy your day,

  8. I still think you rock! You rock my world and I'm not even there joining you! Again, again, again, THANK you from the bottom of my heart...for helping others!

  9. Okay, I'm laughing WITH you. It is probably something I would do and I am very organized when it comes to events. I'm glad your first meeting was so productive.

  10. Great job with the first meeting and staying calm when you turned up in the wrong building!

    Now whenever you pass the other building, you'll say, "That's the building where Share meetings are NOT held!"

  11. lol. I too am laughing with you.

    Sounds like the first meeting went well though, very productive. Kudos Cara!

  12. A lending library? What kind of books do you lend?

  13. I'm so impressed with all your hard work.

  14. Thanks for the offer of counsel - I'm still debating whether to take this idea up with the church (I've found a few examples of other Catholic churches that have done it so I can pitch the idea as a normal thing for a parish to do), but I'm not 100% sure on my approach yet. If I do take the plunge, I will most definitely be needing some guidance. Meanwhile, I look forward to following the adventures of the VT group!




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$3 EACH OR 4 / $10