So - You Want To Be Part of the Memory Walk?

Great! And Welcome - wherever you have come from.

If you saw the article in the paper - Welcome!
If you heard about us on the radio - Welcome!
If you saw a flyer - Welcome!
If you heard it from a friend - Welcome!
If you are a business looking to sponsor us - Welcome!

If you are a bereaved parent - I am so very sorry for all that you have lost - and, Welcome.

This post is really a housekeeping one. So, find the category you came looking for and click on the appropriate link. If you run into difficulty - EMAIL ME - and I will sort it out for you.

Thank you so very much for your role in this Walk for Hope and Rememberance. You are so appreciated by all the grieving families we work with.

TO REGISTER - click HERE to download a REGISTRATION FORM. Either mail to: SSV, PO Box 22 - Proctorsville, Vermont (all checks made out to SSV please) or attach and send to sharesouthernvermont@gmail.com .

TO SPONSOR US - email me with 'SPONSOR' in the subject line. Include your business information, the amount you would like to sponsor the event for, and attach your logo in jpg. form to be published in the program.

TO DONATE - You can either send a check made out to SHARE SOUTHERN VERMONT to PO Box 22, Proctorsville Vermont 05153. Or, you can use the DONATE button on the sidebar through paypal. Grieving families thank you.

TO VOLUNTEER - Please, you guessed it - email me. We are always needing help.

IF YOU CANNOT ATTEND BUT WISH TO HAVE YOUR BABY'S NAME / DATE READ DURING THE MEMORIAL: Download the REGISTRATION FORM and fill out just the parts that apply to you.

IF YOU CANNOT ATTEND BUT WANT TO ORDER T-SHIRTS, MEMORY BEARS, OR MEMORY PIGS: Download the REGISTRATION FORM and fill out just the parts that apply to you.

Ok - basically, whatever you are intending to do to support SSV in this endeavor - you need to EMAIL ME! So here's the address: sharesouthernvermont@gmail.com

IF YOU LIVE LOCALLY & HAVE A TENT WE COULD USE-PLEASE CONTACT ME.

Show and Tell - It Just Feels Right

We, the three board members, sat around the table tossing out ideas for our first event, while munching on oatmeal chocolate chip cookies.

"We're pretty new so let's keep it small."

"Yeah- I mean, the first of anything shouldn't have expectation attached to it, right?"

"Totally. Let's keep it simple. The event is only two months away and our goal is to make the public aware who we are and what we do."

Um...if you have followed any of my blogs you know that I don't really do simple, small, or expectationless. I get ideas and they start to roll, they barrell down the mountain gaining speed and size until they collide with my other boulder sized ideas and merge. My husband chimes in with his genius suggestions and our idea spheres overlap like a zen diagram.

We delegate, to a degree, but it's mostly me asking for sponsors, making flyers, running to stores, and - God help me - loving every single second of it.

These days filled with preparation and tunnel vision so deep that I forget to stop and grab a bite to eat - just feel right. And just when stress did knock me down for a brief moment, and I sipped my soup, breathed deeply and tried to make the constant "to-do" list in my head slow down - Emma's song came on the radio. "Yes sweet girl, this is all for you, because of you."

And so - with more pleasure than I can possibly put into words - I am thrilled to Show and Tell -

SHARE SOUTHERN VERMONT'S - FIRST ANNUAL - MEMORY WALK

The t-shirts will be pale purple and have this awesome message on them:

And these totally loveable little memory bears will be on sale at the event. The pig is actually pink, but it keeps uploading as purple. (If you just must have one...let me know!)

But see, here is the thing. This wouldn't be possible without you. YOU - helped us get our start, hence become a chapter of Share National - hence access the rights to the logos - and WHA-LAA, a first -annual memory walk you have!

The poster says:

"Everyone who has been touched by the loss of a baby is welcome: parents, grandparents – family, friends and hospital staff. Refreshments and a brief memorial at the end of the walk.

Walk With Hope – Walk To Remember"

And I will. The day before mother's day I will walk in memory of all your sweet angel babies. I will also walk with you, whether you are near or far, for you had a hand in this - and I thank you.

Now, go see what everyone else is showing and telling.

Harbored Feelings

The Share National Training was amazing - astounding - uplifting.

It was also a time of awakening and realization, for all who were there. We were a small, intimate group able to bond in every way, and - yes - share our losses, experiences, and desires.

I went with a game plan.
Learn about running a support group.
Learn more about different kinds of losses and how to best support them.
Learn about effective communication (read: how to break down the doors of) the hospital.

Here is what I learned:

• The fear of my Rainbow Baby pregnancy is still with me. It never left. It has morphed into fear, anxiety, and uncertainty that I can raise two healthy, happy, well-adusted, compassionate, can-survive-in-this-crazy-world-even-knowing-they-have-a-sister-who-died girls. (I'm attacking this next - be assured)
• I am still angry, bitter - no, devestated that no-one was there in my hospital room after the "diagnosis of death" but before the delivery to guide me, offer choices for memoralizing my Emma. I wish Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep had been called. I wish a camera had been present - period. I wish...I wish... (Doing this for other people repeteadly will take this from me - I know.)

This post is not a pity party. No, I would never use this forum for that. It is an affirmation of my continued grief and love for my baby girl. It is a way I can demonstrate that assimilation of my loss, does not mean that I have accepted it. I will never accept this. Never.

I will, however, use these grief emotions to further our cause. To reach out to more families. To deliver more memory boxes. To offer more choices. To call in more (and better) resources.

Share Southern Vermont is in a better place after this last weekend. Yes, I learned the nitty-gritty stuff about paperwork, support groups and hospital policies - but I learned something more valuable.

Checklists and achieved goals will not make this corporation thrive. My heart, and all its emotions: anger, bitterness, frustration, hope, joy, and rememberance will.

Thanks to all of you who believe. I do.

You Can't Eat An Elephant In A Day

This is what our Share training guru keeps saying. She sees us ready to flip our blinders (and you all know I have a very effective pair!) and jump into a a new project wanting to see implimentation in moments. With an all knowing smile she says again, "Cara - you can't eat that elephant in a day."

She's right of course. Just like I couldn't grieve my baby girl in a day, or a year, or eight. This is a forever process and I keep learning like everyone else about parts and pieces that I "thought" I had assimilated.

The quantity of tears that have poured out of me this weekend as we cover topic after topic astounds even me. I have realized so many profound things about harbored feelings, all of which I will write about - no doubt.

But for today's show and tell I present a statue of great beauty and meaning.

The Christmas Box Angel - one of five erected across the country - here in St. Charles, Missouri.

She stand for hope and peace in memory of each of our angel babies. Thinking of all of you tonight.

What are you showing and telling?

Yeah - Yeah...He's Pretty Great

"So, what do they like best?" DH asked. I started to read the comments out loud and realized just how many lovely things had been said about him.

"Ooooo" I joshed, they like YOU!

"Wow, he is really talented."
"Your husband sounds awesome!"
"...your darling hubby"
" an awesome life partner"
" your husband is awesome"
and
"You've got a keeper -- talented and sweet!"

At this last one, he blushed a deep crimson. "Well, I'm not for sale...so what product shall I make a few more of?"

He's in the workshop as I type putting the finishing touches on the the tile pieces. And, you might have noticed that I'm moving the pictures of each product under the poll on the sidebar. I'll keep adding if you keep voting. (He mentioned something about ornaments last night - can't wait to see!) AND REMEMBER - THE ONE THAT GETS THE MOST VOTES WILL BE THE FIRST RAFFLE-WAY!!

Oh- and next time you hear from me ....you could Meeeet me in St. Looouis as that is where I'll be for the Share National Training!

I'll post from there for sure!

Show and Tell - Achievement

You know that sense of achievement that washes over you as you finish a long standing project? The waved of accomplishment that you did something big, and it feels so good?

I could see this on my sweet husband's face as he carried each memory box into the dining room, gently placing each on the table.

"Whatcha doing?" I asked, knowing full well what his answer would be. But that was his moment.

"Setting these up so you can take a picture, of course." He grinned - also aware this was an all for show conversation, but - hey - he deserved it!

As I walked to get the camera, he dissappeared back into his workshop. A quick scan of the table showed twenty boxes. What could he be after? I wondered. He emerged with this.

I gasped when I saw it. "Hon, this is gorgeous! What is it? When did you make it?"

"I kinda got...inspired" he said, blushing - "I was thinking...I might...have you help me start one of those eetsie shop things." I just drank him in in that moment. My husband who has made so many life changing decisions in the past two years. He is truly astounding.

I mean ...just look at that angel he made! And the interior.

"Well...what do you think?" "OF COURSE!" I answered, putting my already crazy hat-revovling schedule in the back of my mind. "Of course I will."

"Great!" He said, gaining enthusiasm. "I also made this one. It is simple - but classic. People could use them for whatever they like, not just a memory box or a contempary urn"

"But, instead of making lots of stuff that no-one wants and just sits in my workshop, I was thinking I'd make one of each of my ideas and you could post them on your blog. Your friends could weigh in with what they like and if they were to buy something from the shop what their top choice would be."

Um..he's smart too - no?

"And, I added - what about these first "trial runs"? (which - by the way look damn near perfection to me!) "Could I use them as monthly raffle-ways for Share Southern Vermont?"

"SURE!" he said...and that was that!

So...check this out! Below are:

A super-thick, rod-supported cutting board

A hand designed tile serving tray

And the matching hot-serving dish. (THESE ARE NOT DONE YET! THEY WILL HAVE A GOREGOUS RED GROUT TO COMPLETE THE LOOK!)

Thank you to all who voted in the "what to win?" poll. I am working on finding someone local to help me design a personalized charm necklace / bracelet.

The timing couldn't be better! I am replacing the poll with his sample creations. Please - even if you are just here for Show and Tell, vote for what you would be most likely to purchase, and - if you like what you see...send your we-like-homemade-stuff-for-a-good-cause friends this way!

The item that gets the most votes will be the first RAFFLE WAY prize!

He's still creating...so come on back to see what's new!

And, don't forget to go see what everyone else is showing and telling!